Vancouver was not part of my plan. We had prayed for months that Jason would get into BYU and when he did I felt such relief--we were getting out of Othello. Othello was always temporary and I think a lot of people didn't believe we would get out of there. I remember moving into our house and my three year countdown began. When we got Utah it was amazing and I instantly loved it. I loved having Jason home, I loved the area, and we knew a lot of people around Utah. Utah was going to be home for the long run and I was ready to commit to that but something was nagging at Jason.
Before we left Othello Jason decided to spring WSU on me. He had been accepted and well after all our praying why the crap would we go to WSU when he got into BYU?! I couldn't even listen to him about it because it just made me so mad. I pushed it as to Jason getting cold feet about moving away from the only home he had known and then we were in Utah everything seemed so perfect. Jason was happy and I was happy. I felt so at peace in Utah. In my heart I know Jason moved to Utah for me.
When the prayers came that we needed to come to Vancouver I cried. I can tell you that I cried almost every day with the knowledge that we were going to leave Utah. I knew the Lord had a plan for us but for once in the past three years I felt at home. Home is a big deal to me because the only time I have truly felt I had a home was when I lived with the Leavitt family for a few years. So leaving Utah was one of the most difficult decisions I had to come to terms with.
I love Vancouver. I love our ward, our Bishop is amazing, and I love apartments we are staying in. I am grateful Jason is going to school and that we have figured out a schedule that is working for us but if I am being honest my heart aches for Utah. Yes, it is beautiful here and our ward is really full of wonderful and warm people but it isn't home...yet. I don't know if it will ever be home for me but that does not mean I won't enjoy the time that we are here.
I sacrificed a lot to be here and I hope that this journey is as great as the one we would have had in Utah. I gave away my beautiful puppy Ned, I still cry because I miss him so much, and I gave up a place that felt like home. I love Jason and know that this school fits him better than BYU would have and I know our journey is just beginning. I hope it is a good one.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.